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\title{Trouble Shooting Check List}\date{}\author{}\maketitle

Congratulations on your purchase of my class!  It is one of the
finest, most scientifically advanced classes available today.  It has
been designed to provide you with many hours of trouble-free
enjoyment.  In the unlikely event that the class should malfunction,
please consult the check list below for possible solutions.

\begin{description}

\item[Class room is missing.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: Enter the Engineering Building.

\item[Class terminates immediately.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: Try entering 50 minutes earlier.

\item[Class room chairs are uncomfortable.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: This is an intentional design feature.  Sleep while
leaning forward.

\item[Class room is too hot.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: Remove coat and ski-mask.

\item[The professor is missing.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: Look in the front area of the class room.  If the
problem persists, raise your hand.  The professor will answer.

\item[The professor is not missing.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: There is at present no solution.

\item[The professor's attempts at humor are not funny.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: This is normal.  No correction is required.

\item[Textbook will not open.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: You are holding the unit upside-down.  Turn it over
so that the bound side is on your left.

\item[Textbook is unhelpful.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: {\it Calvin and Hobbes} will not work with this
class. Consult the class documentation for compatible textbooks.

\item[Examples in the book are hard to follow.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: Try turning the book over 180 degrees.

\item[Grades are too low.]
\hfill\linebreak
Possible solution: Give your solutions to the professor at the end of
each test.

\end{description}

{\it Inspired by Desmond Devlin of MAD Magazine.}

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